李晨英语教学网

在本站的留言板上，敏恒贴出了他的一篇习作：

A little girl named Lucy, who is only eight years old, learns to play piano every saturday morning in Hangzhou. After several hours of boring piano lessons, she has to take part in a dance training class in the afternoon. As summer vacation is coming, Lucy thought it was time to get rest. However, she reluctantly goes to learn swimming from 5 pm to 8 pm for twenty days with her father. After a busy and tired whole day, they back home by bus. It was almost nine o’clock when they get home. Does the little poor girl like this kind of life? Of course not. She has to do this because her parents want. If it is possible, they would like her to learn everything. The little girl has no choice.

下面是李晨的改后稿：

Lucy, an eight-year-old girl living in Hangzhou, had to go for her extra curricular lessons every Saturday. In the morning, she took piano lessons; in the afternoon, she joined dance classes. As the summer vacation was coming, Lucy thought it could be a time for relaxation but, in fact, apart from her regular piano and dance classes, she was asked to learn swimming with her father from 5 pm to 8 pm for twenty days during the holiday. After all the training classes, Lucy got home around 9 pm by bus. Poor little Lucy, playing the role of the gentle and quiet cutie who listened to her parents, was exhausted, mentally and physically; worse, she did not have a choice.

下面两段可以作为由 Lucy 的例子引发的评论： Rigorous study has long been an aspect of Chinese life. A good education is considered essential in order to compete successfully for the most desired work positions. When, however, education is regarded as integral, rather than relative, to a person’s eventual social role, its dominance of a young person’s life assumes disturbing proportions. Education’s original purpose, after all, is to give people an all-round basic knowledge that will help them to make important decisions and lead a fulfilling life. As such, it is intended to be an enjoyable as well as enriching experience.

The number of Chinese children that win international music competitions increase each year. Does this mean that China is a country teeming with potential Mozarts? Or that it simply has an excess of parents intent on producing and nurturing music prodigies? In any event, young Chinese musical talent is gauged according to a strict system of music examinations. Prodigies that achieve success in adulthood may wish to thank their parents for administering the discipline necessary for them to succeed. But what of the children whose ability never rises above average? What kind of adults will they turn out to be after being deprived of a happy carefree childhood - for nothing? It is gratifying to note that most Chinese parents encourage their children to study music purely as a means of extending their cultural horizons.

李晨希望敏恒从改后稿中体会到的不仅仅是时态、拼写和句子结构方面的改进，更多的是如何恰当地发表议论。

常常阅读英文杂志的朋友一定能感受到杂志中的“夹叙夹议”的妙处，作者的行文功力，往往在文章的起承转合、遣词造句和发表议论的深度上体现出来。

那么什么样的议论才是恰当的？发表议论又有几种常用的格式呢？大家平时在阅读的时候就需要着重体会这一点，李晨将在今后逐步加以分析。

关于英语写作的训练，李晨希望大家认真学习本站发布的“英语写作视频讲座”，该讲座共有十八讲，全都学习完毕后，李晨会结合写作评改范例做出深入评讲。

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